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 Thomas Ralph Lavinia, 74, of Doylestown, Pennsylvania and summer resident of Southold, New York passed away in his Southold home from cancer on November 8, 2025.
Born in Smithtown, New York, Tom attended Smithtown High School where he was an outstanding athlete in football, basketball and weight events, earning him a place in their Sports Hall of Fame. As a football tackle and punter, Tom was named All Suffolk County, All Long Island and was recruited by over 50 colleges and universities. He accepted Penn State’s offer and spent two years as a defensive tackle.
Tom graduated from Penn State with a Bachelor of Science in Education and he received a Masters of Education in Supervision from Rider University. For sixteen years, he taught ceramics at Central Bucks High School East where he also coached and assisted with football, track, and girls’ basketball. Later, he served fourteen years as the Assistant Principal at Klinger Middle School in the Centennial School District.
Possessing a truly generous spirit, Tom was happiest when helping others. Upon retirement, Tom, who had honed his home renovation and repair skills on his own houses, became eager and readily available to help anyone with work...especially his sons, nieces and nephews. As a member of the Lansdale UMCOR (United Methodist Committee on Relief) team, he made three trips to Mississippi to work on Katrina relief and additional trips to Iowa and Georgia for storm damage repairs and clean up.
Tom’s true passion was fishing. From a very young age he fished the waters around Long Island often recalling that when he was allowed to ride the bus alone to the North Fork, he would stay with his great uncle in Southold and fish. Mostly a “catch and release” fisherman, he could be found salmon fishing in Pulaski, saltwater fishing in Massachusetts and fishing from a kayak in the mangroves off the Florida Keys.
Tom was a member of the Doylestown United Methodist Church and a long-time member of the Doylestown Men’s Rugby Team.
Dearly loved by his family, Tom is survived by his wife of 51 years, Charlene Troy Lavinia, his sons Troy (Arin), Matt (Erika) and his grandchildren James, Mattea, Alex and Addie. He is also survived by two older brothers Robert Lavinia of Paradise Valley, Arizona and Edward Lavinia of Hackettstown, New Jersey.
Memorial contributions can be made to the Bucks County Opportunity Council www.bcoc.org or the Center for Advocacy, Support & Transformation (CAST) www.castnorthfork.org.
The family would like to thank the staff members of Stony Brook Medical, Northwell Health, New York Cancer and Blood, East End Hospice and nurse Nana Sarpomaa for their expertise and compassionate care.
A private celebration of life will be observed at a later date.
DeFriest-Grattan Funeral Home in Southold is serving the family.
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